17 January, 2020
Stalkers can make your life a living hell. They will always be watching you from the shadows. They will impact your thinking and can cause mental health problems. However, before filing for any harassment lawsuits or a restraining order, it is essential that you are sure someone is stalking. Something things can be a fragment of imagination. Here are the signs that someone is stalking you and how to handle them.
Is Stalking A Crime In Your State?
Before you do anything else, look up the state laws on stalking. It is important that you know what makes a stalker a criminal. Many states don’t even consider first-time stalking a felony. The case is different if they were a part of an illegal act, in which case there are grounds for punishment. Also, if that person is out on bail, has a restraining order, injunction, or any other court order, they can be imprisoned for a couple of years or heavily fined. If you suspect they might have been involved in illegal behavior, then you should call the authorities immediately.
It Might Be Someone You Know
There is an excellent chance that the stalker is someone you know. They could be someone from your workplace, a previous intimate partner, a classmate who admires you, or anyone you might have ever been in the same place with repeatedly for an extended period. If you suspect someone, try to look into them by yourself or hire an investigator. It is essential to identify your stalker before you can take them to court.
Stalking Behavior
Stalker's typical pattern of unwanted attention is what makes the stalked person feel uncomfortable. It might also worry them about their own or families’ safety. Stalking generally becomes more frequent over time, and these people may even resort to other methods that might be more terrifying. The pursuer can find several ways to gain more information on you, to harass or get in touch.
There is also a chance that you are being stalked without being aware of it. Your ex might be “accidentally” running into you in the local grocery store or your apartment building. Here are some of the common signs of a stalker:
- They could be damaging your house, vehicle, or another property.
- Driving or walking by your workplace, school, or home.
- They could be using digital methods, like tracking system or hidden surveillance cameras, to track your movement.
- Follow you or show up at almost every place you go to.
- Posting information about you online that is private or can cause harm.
- Monitor your computer and mobile to learn more about you and your family. They could be carefully watching your social media accounts, or hack in and see your to-do lists, gallery, and other applications.
- Some may put you in complicated situations and then show up to solve the problem to appear as the hero. They could hire someone to steal your bag, then chase them down and retrieve it for you, for example.
- They might continuously send inappropriate or unwanted presents. These could be letters, texts, items, online messages, a piece of clothing, or anything else.
- They may even go to a whole new level and look for personal information about you through public records, or by hiring a private investigator.
What You Should If It Is Not Severe?
Most of the time, the people who are stalking you might be some secret admirer who may back off. In that situation, you can do a number of things to make sure that they are not able to get much information on you.
Change your mobile number as soon as possible. You will then need to make sure only to give it to people if it is absolutely necessary. You should also block any number associated with the stalker on your mobile phone. If it's possible, consider changing your handheld device because they might have hacked it.
If you suspect the stalker is someone who could have a key to your place, change all the locks.
If you have a daily routine, then consider changing it. You could run a different route every morning, go to a different coffee place, take the train that leaves earlier, or something else. Stalkers base their schedule based on yours. You can disrupt their entire system and throw them off this way.
Self-Defense
You may want to take some self-defence classes to ensure your safety. If you don't have the time to learn how to defend yourself, then you should consider purchasing a pepper spray for your protection.
How To Deal With A Stalker
Secure Your Home
One of the most important things that you can do to deal with the stalker is to have protection for your house. If you already have a security system in place, consider hiring a professional to make sure there are no faults in it. If you don’t, there are many ways to secure in any budget. You can go for a professional arrangement that has CCTV cameras that can be connected to a mobile device, smart locks for the main doors, and various kinds of sensors in and around the property. You can also go for something that will be cheaper, but make sure it is good enough.
Confrontation
In most cases, it might not be a good idea to confront your stalker. They can prove to be dangerous and cause you harm. On the other hand, their intention might be to get your attention, and acknowledging their presence could make matters worse.
However, the case is different for someone that you know. If you feel like there will be no threat in approaching them, then talk to them and make it as clear as possible that they should leave you alone. It might not be the best idea to scream at their face or name threats. But you shouldn't be nice either since leaving you alone is a demand, not a request. Try to make it brief; they probably want to talk to you.
Record Events
There is not much the police or a lawyer can do about your situation if there is no evidence. Only proof can help you get them arrested, charge them, or get a restraining order against them.
No matter how small a situation is, it is essential that you document everything. Include the dates and times of every event in a book, as well as what happened. Take pictures, record videos, and save everything digital, like messages, voicemail, email, or any other thing.
However, this doesn’t mean that you should wait for the situation to escalate. You can contact the authorities and give details about any potential threats.
Legal Actions
If you decide to take the matter to court, then you should think about the situation carefully. You need to know what kind of case it is and what do you hope to achieve from it.
Getting A Restraining Order
A restraining order is something a court issues to protect someone from physical or mental abuse. It can be issued against anyone who is a threat, and it can even be a member of the family. This helps keep the stalker away from you for a period of time. There are three types of restraining orders, the details are given below:
Emergency Protective Order
You can call the police, and if the primary responder feels like it is necessary for your safety, they will request an emergency restraining order. These orders take effect immediately and are only valid for a duration of a week. You will need to get a temporary or permanent restraining order after that.
Temporary Restraining Order
If a judge thinks that you are in imminent danger, they will issue a temporary restraining order to make sure the perpetrator stays away. It is valid for only 20 to 25 days. It can be issued before the court finalizes the case.
Permanent Restraining Order
After you have the temporary, a permanent restraining order is easy to get. However, it will only be issued if a judge thinks that your life is in constant danger from a person. The exact length varies significantly with each case, but it lasts several years.
If you live in Southern California, contact a San Diego Restraining Order Lawyer as soon as possible. Make sure this fits your situation before you do.
Harassment cases are of two types, civil or criminal. The difference is between the court systems.
A civil case is where you would file to be compensated for any damages that the stalker has done. They also offer many other injunctions that make sure the pursuer stops the behavior. They include cases of assault, battery, stalking, and any violent threats.
The violence threat, however, should be credible, where you may be afraid for your or your family’s safety.
A case will be taken to criminal court if your intention is to punish the stalker. The sentence can be probation, community service, fines, jail, or prison.
I'm Harry Wilson, a senior digital marketing consultant at Globex Outreach. Writing is my part-time hobby because I get to share my experience with the world. Professionally, I help map out a flawless digital marketing plan for the clients at my firm.